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Friday, January 9, 2009

WORST FIRST DATE STORY EVER!!!! hilarious

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!!
We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah .
It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!
Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car .
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation .
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about' what is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.
She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.
Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down. 'And you thought your first date was embarrassing.
Jay Leno's comment...'This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off.'
Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND! SEE YA NEXT WEEK (if I can find something to talk about)

46 comments:

Diane said...

Good one Tootsie! ☺ Diane

Diane said...

ps Marshall's still have 2 crowns. They're on a stand, might be a candle holder but I don't know how to access the inside... Interested???

Tootsie said...

heck yea I'm interested!!!!!
this story is sort of like something out of my past! lol....may just have to blog it one day!

Coloradolady said...

That is too funny. Loved it.

mishebe said...

Ha, ha. That is hilarious. mishelle

Kristen said...

'freezing her butt off' ha ha ha

I left you a photo tag. I'm sure you have some awesome pictures to share!

LillyB said...

Oh my! (Giggling) this tops most of mine LOL

Jessica said...

Oh my world....lol....that had to be TRUE LOVE!

Hugs~ J

Shelia said...

That's hilarious, Tootsie! I can't imagine the horror of it all! Glad they could laugh!
Be a sweetie,
Shelia ;)

onlymehere said...

I remember hearing this or reading about it in the paper many years ago! Too funny. I still laugh every time I hear it!

Rachael said...

OMG! That story is too much! hahaha

Thanks for sharing it :-)

cindy said...

Oh yeah! Embarassing dates are a very 'special' part of my past too! Too bad thats not the part of my memory that seems to be slipping...dang! Have a great weekend! Cindy

Chrissy said...

Man you did it again, got to show my daughter this one, 17, stunning and still hasn't had her first date!!!This might make her want to be a nun!!! Talk to you later...

SchmeckyGirl said...

LMAO!!! Oh can you imagine!?!?! That's hysterical! You HAVE to get married after that! lol.

beddow said...

I had heard this story before but didn't realize it was for real! Oh my that would be something.

Betty

Happy To Be said...

Now thats funny girl..and I watch Jay Leno every night..thanks for the morning laugh...hugs and smiles Gloria..ps the internet did't kick me off yet YAHOO!! been having problem with it

nikkicrumpet said...

OH MY GOSH...I would have died...what a funny story.

Chris said...

Oh Tootsie, I LMAO, can you imagine? Sorry I missed that one.

Hugs,
Chris

Helen said...

I didn't see the show and I am still laughing five minutes after reading the story.....

Jill said...

OMG! ROFLMAO! That is hysterical! I must say that is the worst date ever at least it wasn't one of yours.

Dawnie said...

Man I wouldnt know what to do...that is so funny! I wouldnt have a problem doing that now with baldyman but for a first date???WOW I"m glad they are together.

salmagundi said...

Funny story! I'm so glad they got married - at least they can put their embarrassment BEHIND them!! Sally

Raxx - A day in the life said...

I am laughing my head off reading this! Oh my! With that kind of beginning it could only have a happy ending! ROTFLMAO!!!

jerseygirl211 said...

If I was that girl, I would still be stuck to the car. What courage they both had, I wouldn't have been able to get past my embarassment and would NOT have seen him again. Thank God there are people who can handle this sort of thing better than me.

Love & Hugs
'D'

Glad you like the floor. :)

donnaray said...

Hey Tootsie, I hope you got to see the THRONE, now I have to get a couple of crowns for Ben and I.
Please let me know if you managed to see it, (the throne). I hope things are going well with you and your family.

Femin Susan said...

How awesome! Thanks for sharing!
may god bless you !

bj said...

I'm tellin' you, Tootsie, I just laughed so dang hard at "pee'd her butt off the fender" that I just p'd my pants, too...and...spit my iced, SWEET tea all over my key board....That is so so funny, girl...
xo bj

~♥~ Monica S said...

HAhahahaha that was just too funny!! OMG I can't stop grinning!

haha

Have a great weekend
Monica

imjacobsmom said...

I would be mortified! But this sounds like something that could've have happened to me....Robyn

Lynne (lynnesgiftsfromtheheart) said...

This was hysterical... definetly one for the books...I'm glad to hear even you have faux greenery..one that has all those lucious plants...hugs ~lynne~

The Muse said...

EEEEouuuu LOL LOL
but eeeeouuuuu !!! LOL

Sweetie said...

This is just too funny. It's so funny that I almost peed my pants!!
Sweetie

Carol said...

Oh my goodness, that story is so funny! I wish I had been watching Jay when that was being told! Have a super weekend Tootsie!
Smiles,
Carol

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

That is hysterical!! I am laughing so hard, I have tears in my eyes! So glad it turned out well for them though. laurie

Lady Katherine said...

Ok none of this lol stuff! I have not laughed so much in so many years!!!! Gosh I think I have won my crown today, from laughing so much! I can not stop laughing! Tootsie Thank you so much!!! For such a good time, laughing!!

Terrie's Lil' Piece of Serenity said...

How funny!! It is sweet that they ended up married.

Picket said...

Girl that is the funniest thing I have ever heard! lol Hope you are having a great weekend!

Justine said...

This is the best first date story I have ever heard! Thanks for sharing it with us, girl! It was so damn funny!

Justine :o )

Theresa @ Take A Sentimental Journey said...

Well,don't know which would be worse. Being pissed off or pissed on ! LOL .

Miss Janice said...

Lord have mercy girl, that was funny! Please stop by my blog, if you have a moment. I have a friend who needs our prayers.

THIS IS ME....ONLINE said...

HELLO! After reading that one story....you have a new follower. (Change that to reader. Follower sounds way too weird.) That story is great. As they say "necessity is the mother of invention".

Your garden is amazing. What a green thumb!

prof en retraite said...

Oh what a hoot! You'd have to marry the guy after a first date like that!!! Thanks, Tootsie...Debbie

Nancy Jane said...

Hi Tootsie- Come visit to see the garden 'pest' I finally caught on film. (To this point I've only seen their tracks in the snow on my lawn and the havoc they reek on my bushes!) In jest, I threatened to turn him into venison and scared poor Mom/Linda! Have reassured her that we don't really shoot them. Nancy

Kristens Creations said...

Oh my goodness! This is the funniest and most embarrassing thing I've ever heard! LOL!!!

Bella Casa said...

OMG, I love that story, how funny was that???

Thanks for the great post!

xoxo
Bella

Tracey McBride said...

ROFL This is such a GREAT story!! Talk of bonding (or...should I say Un-bonding ;). Thanks Tootsie for the belly laugh!
Warmly,
Tracey
P.S. Great ending too...marriage!