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Sunday, January 17, 2010

I Ain't No Redneck- BUT....

Forget Rednecks!
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canadians:
the sad part is some of it I do! lol ha ha !!! enjoy!

If someone in a Home Depot store
Offers you assistance and they don't work there,
You may live in Canada .. ( or me in the plant department

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You may live in Canada .

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation
With someone who dialed a wrong number,
You may live in Canada . (done this a few times! )

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere
South of Detroit for the weekend,
You may live in Canada .

If you measure distance in hours,
You may live in Canada . (yep...I do this! lol)

If you know several people
Who have hit a deer more than once,
You may live in Canada . ( yes...yes I do)

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
In the same day and back again,
You may live in Canada . ( and this happens a lot...ha ha)

If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow
During a raging blizzard without flinching,
You may live in Canada .

If you install security lights on your house and garage,
But leave both unlocked,
You may live in Canada . (were they at my house???? ha ha)

If you carry jumper cables in your car
And your wife knows how to use them,
You may live in Canada . (hey!!! what's wrong with a girl knowing this????)

If you design your kid's Halloween costume
To fit over a snowsuit,
You may live in Canada . (it's sad...but I do this every year!)

If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --
You're going 95 and everybody is passing you,
You may live in Canada . (speed is a passion you know! I love it!)

If driving is better in the winter
Because the potholes are filled with snow,
You may live in Canada . (only in Saskatchewan...we don't have this here in Alberta so much)

If you know all 4 seasons:
Almost winter, winter, still winter,
and road construction,
You may live in Canada . (sucks...but it's true)

If you have more miles
On your snow blower than your car,
You may live in Canada . (hey!!! I want a snow shovel isn't gas powered!)

If you find -5 degrees 'a little chilly',
You may live in Canada . ( ya Justine!!!)

If you actually understand these jokes,
and share them with all of your friends,

you definitely are Canadian and proud to be.

have a good weekend kids! see ya soon....
Life as a single mom is a busy one to say the least. I have been taking a lot of photos of what I have been when I finally have the time and the energy to get back on here full time...LOOK OUT! TOOTSIE HAS BEEN A BUSY GAL!
miss ya guys!

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Tamara Jansen said...

That is HILARIOUS! I could make a list up like that for China.....

If RATS are on the menu, you may live in China.

If you wear a winter jacket and toque in the office and leave the windows open for fresh air, you may live in China.

Take care!

Rosie Nixon Fluerty said...

Hey there Tootsie - you take your time you've got your hands full over there. I'll patiently wait to see the photos. I like this bit of your article about the potholes being filled with snow - we've huge ones on our road now that the stuff is melting. My relatives from Canada head to Portugal from December and don't get back to the combi till April.

I've always wanted to visit Saskatchewan........... I've been told its pretty cold there!

keep in touch Tootsie.


deb said...

Love this...thanks!

Sue said...

Loved this post, Tootsie. A lot of these also apply to northern Michigan!! I don't think I'll EVER get the hang of driving in a blizzard though.
Have a great week!

Justine said...

OMG, some of these were hysterical! Now WHY on earth do you NOT have a snow blower with all the frickin' snow you get there? Girl, go to Home Depot and GET one, TODAY. And while you're there, you can pretend to be an employee and help other customers. LOL

Justine :o )

raxx a day in the life said...

I spent the last year working with Canadians! So this was a fun read for me! They live in Quebec one of their names is Annie do you know her? (joke, ha!)

She told me that Americans ask Canadians about other Canadians like your population is 200 max!

Have a great day!

Marty@A Stroll Thru Life said...

Tootsie, you are so funny. I think all of these things are true for other parts of the world too. I can't wait to see what all you've been up to. Hugs, Marty

Marjorie (Molly) Smith said...

Good morning, thanks for stopping by my blog, I've also not been the best blogger friend lately. Have just had so much going on both good and Bad. I try to read as much as possible even it I don't have time to leave a comment.
I look forward to your flowers this summer. I loved you Jeff Foxworthy post, it could also apply to MS I have held long conversations with wrong # our weather is Summer, Summer, Christmas and almost Summer.
Have a blessed week

SmilingSally said...

LOL Oh, Tootsie, I do love Jeff Foxworthy!

Lynne (lynnesgiftsfromtheheart) said...

Too funny Tootsie. I hope this finds you doing ok.. read you are single now?? Life is ever changing isn't it? I know ours changes from hour to hour around here, some days are roses other thorns. Thank you so much for swinging in and saying hello.. it was a wonderful gift to me today... hugs ~lynne~

Sonia said...

That's hysterical! I love Jeff family is from the deep South and we have lots of rednecks in it...I'm guilty too! Love your post Tootsie...Have a great week!

Miss Bloomers

Alberta said...

My question to you and all other CDN Rednecks is...does Jeff Foxworthy have a secret CDN relative that we don't know about??? That list is oh so funny and right on the mark!

Moore Minutes said...

He is a funny guy for sure! I've heard his redneck jokes a lot but never these. :) I don't live in Canada BUT I do love it there! Beautiful country.

GardenOfDaisies said...

Very funny! I don't live in Canada anymore 9I did when I was a kid) , but I do measure distance in hours. :-)

Julie said...

Dear Tootsie,
All my best to you in the single parenting department! I did that for a few years when my son was small. I am now helping to raise my 2 grandkids who live here and it is a challenge at times for my 52 year old self. At least you have age on your side!!! YEA!!!
How old are your three babies now???
xoxo- Julie

artis1111 said...

I am from Ky. Tn. and Va. so I am 3 times a redneck .hehehe Kathy

Thoughtfully Blended Hearts said...

Tootsie, you'd make a wonderful Southern many of those pertain to us Southern's scary!!! ;-)

onlymehere said...

Tootsie: I just read Lynne's comment above. Is this true? It explains much if it is and I'm so sorry (or should I be so happy?) or whatever applies at the changes in your life. This was way too funny! I remember reading an article once on Kiefer and they said that being a Canadian he was always so polite and kind but that all Canadians pretty much were. We need more of that in the States! Stay warm and I say, there's nothing wrong with designing a Halloween costume to fit over a snow suit! Every year I did it to fit over a coat! {{{BIG HUGS}} Me.

Darla said...

These are funny Tootsie, I can't wait to see what you have been up to now!!! Air Hugs..

9405018--Pat said...

Great post are so funny girl take care of yourself....pat H

Brenda Pruitt said...

He's always a hoot! I hail from Oklahoma and live in Texas. So much of what he says applies to me.

Anonymous said...

I'm mighty proud to know all you Canadians. You know in Ky. we get the redneck jokes. Who cares. You gotta laugh at yourself.

Anonymous said...

Living in Nova Scotia, I can relate. :) Very cute. (My daughter lives in Grande Prairie.)

"Blossom" said...

Too funny Toots. Can't wait for things to slow down for you.
It's going to be 48 her today but cloudy. Have a wonderful day girlfriend.

Becca's Dirt said...

Yep you are a redneck canadian. It takes a redneck to know one. Love ya Toots. Can't wait to see what you've been up to. Are you counting down the days like I am?

tori said...

oh man! All of these applied to me when I lived in Michigan (except for the -5...that's cold!!!)
thanks for the smiles!

Happy To Be/ Gl♥ria said...

Hey sweet daughter I want to know what you been up to...Girl I have been just trying to stay in and clean this pig pen I call my house ha ha!! how can only 2 people make a mess is beyond me...Love ya girl...Hugs and love Gloria

Lori E said...

I should get a commission at Home Depot and other stores when I am in their plant sections.
Don't you love being Canadian? Me too.

DoanLegacy said...

Oh that was funny! I have seen people in Michigan wear shorts and I can relate..

Love the Decor! said...

HI There
Just checking in. Hope all is going well for you my friend!! this was a cute post, it made me smile thank you for that!

Tracy said...

Oh My gosh...the first several sound like Texans LOL
Haven't been blogging for a while...good to be back, hope all is well with you.

Sigrun said...

That's a hoot. Looking forward to seeing what you've been up to. We're starting up the greenhouses in about 3 weeks. Looking forward/not looking forward to it. I am looking forward to getting the yard ready for our daughter's outdoor wedding in July. Lots of neglected work needs catching up--but now there's a motive and a deadline.

cindy said...

Some of these fit us Minnesotans too! Hope all is well! Got your seeds planted yet?

cindy said...

Some of these fit us Minnesotans too! Hope all is well! Got your seeds planted yet?

The JR said...

Looking forward to seeing those projects!

linda may said...

G'Day, I just discovered you were back on. Not many flowers around my yard now except the trusty old oleanders...can't kill 'em. Last week I posted some pics of the park near my house, I hope these suffice to let me contribute.

linda may said...

OOops sorry Tootsie. That last comment is supposed to go in the post before this one. Silly me.
Love this post. You Canadians sound a lot like us Aussies. Except for the snow we could be guilty of doing all that too. And yes you should be Proud!

linda may said...

Hey in the outback on dirt roads the potholes are filled with what is known as bull dust. The holes are really big and if you hit them they go off with such a bang and scare the hell out of you, not to mention not doing your car much good either. Bull dust is real fine particles which completely disguise the holes.

Nishant said...

Hope all is going well for you my friend!! this was a cute post, it made me smile thank you for that!

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