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Thursday, September 8, 2011

Fertilizer Friday/ Flaunt Your Flowers Sept 9/11 (and a huge announcement)



This week's flaunt is up a bit early today because I have a huge announcement to make at the same time…and I also need to be elsewhere at the usual time!!!

Happy Friday!
Friday is a BIG day for us here at Tootsie Time…(ok, just me…there is no one else here…lol) It’s a big deal because it means it’s PARTY TIME!!!! Fertilizer Friday is the day of the week than an ELITE group of gardeners from all around the world get together, snap photos, link up and Flaunt Their Flowers!!!
If you are new to Tootsie Time and Fertilizer Friday, I just know you are asking yourself…”How do I join?”
Well…it’s easy really. Here’s all you need to know to become a part of this great group of gardeners, bloggers and friends:
If it is spring or summer where you live, you need to snap a few photos of what you have growing, blooming or just love to look at that is of the plant variety…if it is winter where you live, you may post past favorite photos…or indoor plants…whatever you like. The only criteria is that it is a plant or something growing!
You do not need to use fertilizer to participate in this party, but if you do, this is the reminder to fertilize weekly!
All I ask is that: Your post must include the logo above and/or a link to Tootsie Time, or the linky will be deleted.

So....I would like to invite each and every one of you to join in and share your photos...

Welcome to another week in the gardens that I love so much to share!

It has been a bitter sweet season in my gardens for my children and me this year. Many of you who know me on a personal level know of what I speak…and for those who don’t know, allow me to explain:

After a long and painful journey through what seems to have been hell and back, I am finally free. The path to this divorce was a long and difficult one…with more ugly details than a sensational movie…but the kids and I have come through it…stronger and happier than we ever imagined that we could be. It is taking a lot of healing but with the support of many beautiful friends and my family we have come to realize, that – in spite of the horrors we lived through - it is the best thing that has ever happened to any of us…with one exception.

The divorce is final…I am free of the marriage…but the ‘lovely’ man that I have left, has not let this be easy to do. There has been issue upon issue that has dragged it out …and just a few weeks ago, a judge heard his arguments again, and granted him the one thing that the kids and I thought would not ever happen to us. The ONE thing he promised them that he would never do to them. We have been ordered to sell our house.

Yes…we are forced to move. Leave behind our home… gardens and all that I have put into this place. The blood, sweat, tears… (lots of tears…) creative changes…fond memories of friends and family…and my greenhouse will all be but a memory soon enough. My children will have to say goodbye to the only home they remember…and they will be forced to adjust to yet another life change…all for the sake of one man’s greed. Lets be honest – put all the cards on the table…why else would someone force three little kids out of their home? If I was not forced to move, I would have stayed…and simply CONTINUED to maintain the home and continue life with the kids as I have been doing for the last few years. It doesn’t matter the emotional damage…or the effect that this will have on the kids…the money is the most important thing to him. It is very sad.

So…it is with a heavy heart…that I will say goodbye to my gardens…and home. The kids and I will move on…to a new beginning…and I will leave the little piece of heaven that I have cherished for so long behind. I have been writing this post now for almost two weeks…unable to write but a few words without the tears falling. When I broke the news to my children…ages 12, 10 and 6…they were DEVASTATED. It is the sadness of the kids that has affected me most.

My oldest daughter did not speak for nearly a full day…she would just lay on her bed and sob…she stayed in her room alone all day long.

My son was not surprised…He just got quiet…and the tears rolled down his cheeks…he mentioned how sad he was …and how it “sucks” that we have to leave the great neighbor (Justin) to the west of us…who has become a member of our family and been such a support to us all.

It was the reaction of my youngest that broke my heart most. She cried and cried…she doesn’t understand why her whole life has been so difficult…she was only 3 when her family was destroyed…and she is insecure about most things because of it all. She just clung to me…crying and begging me to fix it…please mommy make it different…I don’t want to move!

We spent some time together talking and after a bunch of scared questions…that I tried to answer as best I could, the worst of all…was when they told me how sorry they are that I have to leave my greenhouse. It was then that I cried and cried. Not because of the greenhouse, but because I was so touched that they even thought to say something like this to me. I am a very proud mom.

So…this will be the summer of a million photos…trying to memorize every detail of the things we all love most about this place…

Suddenly going out on the lake or to anywhere else doesn’t seem quite so inviting…we are spending time in our home…enjoying every single moment that we have in this place. As for me…I am planning.

I am planning my new greenhouse…the one I will design to MY specifics…and have built at my new home…The one that will be better than any that I have had before…It will be a brand new piece of heaven…and it will offer me the same sanctuary from life's storms that this one has…My gardens…I can rebuild…heck…I did every single one of the 17 in this yard all by myself…so what’s stopping me?

I will not miss a season…not skip a beat…I will not be defeated…or broken again…I am Tootsie…and I am strong and resilient. Right?

I am trying my best to keep thinking on the positive side of all of this…trying not to let this bring me to my knees…That man will not break me again. And so I am planning…and imagining…and composing posts and projects in my head.

Just think of all the posts I will share…the adventures in gardening…home renovations and decor…the projects...and the growth…both personal and as a family…perhaps…just as the divorce was the best thing that has ever happened to both me and the kids…maybe this will be too.

I cannot say that I am excited about this recent blow to my kids and that I am not worried about them…but I can say…that no matter what has happened…my kids and I are closer and stronger than ever before. Together we will get through yet another change…and be there to hold hands and say we survived.

So…without further adieu, this is my flaunt for this week. In the coming weeks you will notice that some things will be changing around the yard. I am going to be pulling some of the yard art out, potting up some of my favorite perennials, and prepping for the move. The house is listed as of today, and I will not be leaving all my treasures behind for a stranger to ruin. haha


My gardens are feeling a little tired. Many things are almost finished…and the frost is just days away I am sure.


It has been incredibly hot the last week or so…warmer temps than we had all summer!


I wish summer could last forever!j





This bed looks very overgrown…it is just looking messy now.



I love the vivid colors




The clematis is looking fine now!


These look better in photos than they do in person anymore! haha



I like the sun filtering through the trees…


I already miss this view.


Thank you for all the support and for taking the time to walk though my gardens with me this week!

Now…what are you waiting for??? Get your flaunt on!!!

Hugs and smiles…wishes for a safe and happy weekend to you all. Thank you to all who have dropped in and left a comment and a link for their flaunt! I hope to see you all again next week!

*)*)*) to my special three…Money can buy you things and it might even buy you some level of happiness, but it certainly can't buy you class or morals. I really wish I could travel with Karma...I'd love to be there when "what goes around, comes around."

¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.

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you can find links to these and more great blog parties here


That Bloomin' Garden said...

Sorry to hear about the move but imagine the new life journey and its possibilities. I have been in your shoes. My children adjusted quickly. They are so resilient. If there is anything you need,let me know, plants can travel in the mail, hint hint.

Catherine@AGardenerinProgress said...

That will be a big change for all of you. I'm sorry that you and your kids have to go through all of this. I look forward to seeing what you do in your new place and hope the kids adjust quickly and well.

Sherah said...

Oh, Glenda....I am in complete and utter AWE of your backyard!!! I am a Mom to 7 kids ages 12 & under and 1 more on the way - so I don't have time to do more than the bare bones of keeping my house tidy + 1 or 2 little projects...but I have such a love of flowers, I wish I could keep them alive!

Someday I hope to have a lovely, gorgeous yard like yours and be able to devote time to it - for now, I'll enjoy your pictures. =)

And I wanted to say that I know you are going to something better - it's like a blank page waiting to be written on, and I'm excited to see what is in your future! And to watch you transform a new home. God bless you. =)

Netty said...

Tootsie, I'm not sure what to say to you. I am glad that a horrible chapter of your life is over, but I'm so sad that you have to leave your home. This could be a fresh may find a place you love even MORE and think of all the fun you will have with a new yard-a clean slate to begin with!! I wish you and your kids all the best on this new journey. I'll be here every step of the way :)

Larry said...

Tootsie... as I started reading your post, my first reaction was to pray for you... I immediately was overwhelmed by a sense of what a strong woman you are and that your children surely come from that same place, and they will get through this. As I read on, I heard you saying some of the very things I had been thinking. I so often think of the concept that what doesn't kill you, will make you stronger... the whole concept of tempering steel with fire. You will come through this a better and stronger person than you are even at this point in time. And because you are their mother, your children will grow and continue to be the wonderful loving mini-Tootsies that they are, and they will come through this as well, and well. I will pray that you won't allow anger a place in you life or the lives of your little ones... as it only hurts you and your children... somehow I sense that you are very much up to these challenges you face and that it's not just 'talk'. As a teacher, I've seen so many hurt though these difficult situations... the ones who survive the best are the ones who somehow manage to forgive... not for the sake of the one who has wronged them... but for their own sake and for the sake of their children.

Thank you for all that you do... and forgive me if I have said too much... Larry

Linda @ Linda's Lunacy said...

Wishing you all the best with your move, Tootsie.

Beth said...

Tootsie, I am so sorry for the injustices done to you and your children. Your vivid colors, your yard art, your perfect edging, your lush lawn and your greenhouse...I will certainly see those again, in a different location. While I will enjoy seeing you design from scratch, I'm sorry you have to!
Hugs, Beth

~~Rhonda said...

{{{{Glenda}}}} I am so sorry, especially for your children. I hope, though, that this proves to be an opportunity for you and your family. New gardens to design! Praying for you as you make this transition. ~~Rhonda

Millie said...

I am so sorry that you and your children have to leave your little paradise!I especially dislike hearing about children being uprooted like that.
However, I see that you are already making plans for your future garden and home so that will encourage the kids.
The gardens, by the way, are gorgeous!

Shirley said...

Glenda, my heart breaks for you and your children. You have been through the worst of times but I am happy to read that your family is stronger for it. New beginnings are ahead and tough days to come but it will be, after all this, a new start. A fresh beginning. I hope and pray it goes smoothly and your family will remain strong and close.

Cindy @ Dwellings-The Heart of Your Home said...

Your garden and photographs are amazing! My heart just breaks reading this Glenda. I am so sorry that you and your children have been going through this. Keep looking up, God will see you through!

Karen said...

Oh, Tootsie, I just don't know what to say other than I'm very, very sorry. What a shame he has to be so selfish. I wish all the people who flaunt every week lived close to you, we'd all come over and help you get the garden ready to move! We went through this with my best friend whose ex pulled the same stunt; though it was incredibly hard for her and the children, in the end it was the best thing for them. They moved on to much greener pastures and life is so much better away from the grump.

Hugs to you, Tootsie, and please keep us posted. I think of you so often, you are my idol!

ANGEL said...

stay strong glenda. god bless you and your kids. thanks for hosting!

Gatsbys Gardens said...


Even though all of this your garden is a testament to your talent. You will make it work again!


One said...

I'm sorry to hear about you and your family having to leave this wonderful garden. However, it is through this situation that you get to find out your kids' concern of you. Isn't that a valuable discovery?

Rosie Gan said...

I am shocked at your news, and am close to tears, reading what you wrote. But I am so glad that your spirit is not broken, and that you will rebuild. A house is merely a shell you are leaving, and I think that starting anew with your young children can only be are free to build a HOME.No bad memories in this new home...only fresh positive vibes that you and the little ones create. Take of yourself, be healthy and be happy.

Gayle said...

I am so sorry you and your children have to move.....Glad you are taking some of your favorite plants, and I , like everyone else will be waiting and encouraging you as you build your new "Tootsie Garden".

Autumn Belle said...

Glenda, I am so shocked but sorry to hear about the heartbreaking trials you and your kids are going through. I can understand how difficult it must be for the little ones who would have grown so attached to their home, life, friends and neighbourhood. I hope, pray (and I am sure) that you shall be their pillar of strength, to show them the way to start afresh and build up the pieces again. It is a good thing to start NEW. Your garden is your masterpiece, you have the capability to make a new paradise for you and your kids. It is just too bad that he isn't a part if this anymore, definitely the loss is his. Remember, "the one who laugh last, laughs best".

Keep on posting. Don't give up. I wish to see your progress. I wish for your happiness. May the good Lord bless you and your kids.


Sue said...

Tootsie-I'm so sorry about this.
Couldn't you just "buy" out his half??? That would certainly be "cheaper" than buying a whole house someplace else and having to start all over??? At least it would be easier on the kids, I would think.
Anyway, sorry again. I hope all turns out okay.

Donna said...

I am trying to think of anything to say but what can I...I just knew from the beginning and from recent FB posts this was the outcome. My sister continues to go through the remnants of a bitter divorce with someone selfish as well. She moved and finally has built a home that is her own. I think this will help her rebuild her life as she wants it and the I wish the same for you. I will not cry tears of sorrow for you but tears of joy that you can finally move on...I wish you all the best and we love all love you and are here for you!!

Tina´s PicStory said...

All the best for you and the kids :)

Linda said...

Glenda, what a lot for your family to go through. It will be sad to leave your home, but just think what you will be able to do with your new one. Move on from these experiences, you never know what is out there waiting for you.

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

Dear, dear Tootsie ~ My heart aches for you and your kids. You all are in my thoughts and prayers.

There is a wonderful house with land out there just waiting for the Tootsie's loving touch for making it your own 'home sweet home' with beautiful gardens and a fantastic greenhouse. New memories will be made, love will continue growing and the bonds stronger yet between yourself and your kids.

Love and hugs to you all as you step out of this life you now live into a new adventure.


Diane at My Cottage Garden said...

Very difficult for you go to through what you have, Glenda. I supported my brother through something like this, and so I have a tiny bit of insight into how difficult it must be.

You and the kids will move on to the next stage in your life together, and you'll make more happy memories there! Someday you will look back on it all, and be able to smile at your pictures.

And you'l be able to start over lots of planning, dreaming and scheming over the winter!

Hugs to you.

cherry said...

My heart is breaking for you and your beautiful children..I wish I was close enough to give you a big hug and helping hand.. I do look forward to seeing what beauty you will create because I know you will be right back at it very soon.
Big hugs from Savannah, Cherry

Anonymous said...

For all things there is a season... Even though this will be a big adjustment for all involved, there is a certain freedom of the soul that is now yours. Enjoy this next chapter of your life.... Blessings to you and your children..

Darla said...

Oh Tootsie, now that you have broken then news to the little ones, it's time to put a new spin on things. A new home, a new yard, new gardens, new friends and a new greenhouse...a clean slate without ugly memories to weigh you and your little ones down! I say we pop the champagne cork for us and the sparkling apple cider for the little ones and make a toast to GREAT things to come!!!!!

Rebecca said...

I am so sorry for you and your children... Life stinks sometimes, but if we could only see into the future--(I know your new gardens will be spectacular) :) I'll be praying for a easy transition, I know that change is so hard. Hang in there--all of us "garden bloggers" have your back!

Anonymous said...

Glenda, I'm so sorry that you and your babies have been treated so awful. I'm sending big hugs for the four of you. I went through similar nastiness years ago, although I got to keep the house. I'm not sure I was better off with his bad memories lingering there. You'll be surprised how quickly the kids bounce back. You will have a fresh start with so many new memories and gardens. You get to turn a drab property into a stunning paradise! Now that sounds fun! Take care.

Debbie-Dabble Blog and A Debbie-Dabble Christmas said...

My heart breaks for you and your children having to leave your home but i know you will survive and maybe find a better place that you can make your own and make beautiful new memories with your children.
I don't know if you follow Brenda at Cozy little house but she is going through the same thing only she does not have small children. Here is her link:

Janet said...

My heart aches for you and your children...I have been where you are and I found that having a "clean slate" was best for me and my kids..I pray it will be for you too.

GardenOfDaisies said...

Oh dear, I am so sorry you and your kids have been going through this. Yes, you are strong. You will move and it will be the best thing in the long run. A new beginning in a new place, free from the reminders of the man. Hang in there honey.

Lona said...

Glenda girl my heart goes out to you. I know what you are going through and all of the heartaches and frustrations over the last few years. As a mother when it touches the kids is when it hurts even more. But The kids will be fine with such a loving Momma and Grandparents. My kids turned out swell. LOL!
You just have to think that it is a move onto better things for you and the kids.
I know you girl and you will just be stronger and make your own home for them again. Hugs.

Tiffany said...

First time linking all of your flowers! Have a great weekend.


Jennifer@threedogsinagarden said...

Glenda, Your news is heartbreaking! Your poor kids. It brings tears to my eyes. It is hard enough dealing with the divorce, let alone moving to a strange place. What must their Dad be thinking?
You can at least take comfort in each other.
Your garden is just beautiful in your pictures and I am certain the next garden that you create will be every bit as lovely!

Charlotte said...

Your yard and gardens are beautiful! Your flowers don't look tired:) It has been hot and dry here for some time and my plants are looking very weary:( It is time for the season to be rolling over..and taking a rest.

Tracy said...

So sorry to hear of all that you have been through. Your gardens are just spectactular, always gorgeous and always amaze me. Wherever you go, you will make it your own and it will be amazing. Your children sound wonderful and you are right to be proud of them. I'm sure they are proud of you too. They are lucky to have such a wonderful Mom. Take care and may all good things be in your future!

LindyLouMac said...

I know that I have not been able to join you for Fertiliser Friday recently, but I do always call by and I was stunned to read your news today. My thoughts will be with you as you move forward towards an unwanted adventure but I am sure the four of you will rise to the challenge. Good Luck.

Carol said...

Toots, I am so sorry too. I can't tell you how many gardens I have had to leave behind because of the twists in life that have been thrown at me ~~ 4 I think. I always say-I am NOT doing that again and guess what? I have to dig in the dirt and do it anyway! What really hurts is my ex let all my hard work go to ruin! Oh well. It is fun to have a blank slate, but I am now getting older and it's not nearly as easy as it once was! God bless to you and the tootettes Carol

Andrea said...

Hello Tootsie, i didn't intend to link as i forget it already is a Saturday here, so i also did even if mine is already at the end. I am both sorry and thankful for your family. But you are a strong person, i am sure your young kids have a good mother to cling on to for these times of trials. You are moving on and the garden is all in your head, it will be sprouting again wonderfully wherever you put it. We are all here to help and cheer you up. If only i am nearer i can lend you a hand. My batchmate in HS was with me yesterday and told me of her separation too, and she was stronger than ever. Thanks God you are well, we will pray for you. God bless.

Anonymous said...

I'm so saddened to hear about the kids, but with a Mom like you, I'm not going to worry.Your garden is so beautiful and your yard and walk ways, but you seem to never slow down so it will only be a short time until you have an even more amazing garden and home. You make me proud to be a woman. God Bless you and your kids.♥

Kingdom said...

Hi Tootsie! Your garden is amazing! but with challenges that you're facing, just remember that there will be no "best" if you can not do better. :) I'd like to also share a thought from Michel de Montaigne...he said..."The value of life lies, not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them; a man may live long, yet live very little. Satisfaction in life depends not on the number of your years, but on your will."

Thanks and take care!

gena said...

I'm so sorry that your little family has been through such horrors and that you're forced from your beautiful home. But, as this chapter closes and a new one begins, I can't help but feel a little excited for you too. Your journey is shifting, but who's to say it won't be more exciting, more spectacular and that your new gardens won't be even better ?

I will pray that the kids adapt quickly and that their new home will bring about the fresh new start and happiness that you all deserve !


9405018--Pat said...

I'm so sorry. I wish you and your children the best. I'll be here every step of the way...hugs Pat H

Alberta said...

Life just isn't fair sometimes, like now for you and your children. All your faithful Tootsie Time followers know how strong and determined you are; this will not drag you down, it will make you stronger.

What a gift to some lucky new owners to have such a wonderful home! You've taken care of your surroundings with all your heart. I can't wait to follow your new adventures whatever you put down roots!


Lynne (lynnesgiftsfromtheheart) said...

Tootsie, I'm not sure what to say. this just blew me away. I know there is a rhyme and reason for every season, sometimes I wonder why there aren't more rhyme's... You handled this so beautifully with the children, thank goodness for the most part they bounce back easily. I know the next home you find will be just that a "home" filled with love and laughter and more memories. At least our memories no one can take away.... you know where I am email anytime... hugs and hugs ~lynne~

Becca's Dirt said...

Oh Tootsie I'm so sorry about what's going on up there sweetie. Gosh that's terrible that the kids have to be uprooted. I'm sorry for those kids having to move. I know you will find a great place for your gardens. Moving is a job but you are moving a yard too girl. Not gonna be easy. Wish I were close - I'd be right there packing with you and toting stuff. Good luck Glenda.

Anonymous said...

No worries — you aren't doing anything incorrect!